This post is going to cover a strategy called self-soothing. The technique is from Dialectical Behaviour Therapy, and it falls under the category of distress tolerance skills. Distress tolerance skills are useful for getting through a crisis situation or a diffiuclt moment without making the situation worse. Self-soothing skills can also be used for self-care or self-regulation and can help to increase compassion towards ones-self.
When thinking about what self-soothing strategies to use, it can help to divide potential ideas into the five senses.
TOUCH
Touch can be used in many different ways and can be incredibly soothing. Some ideas from this category are wrapping yourself up in a blanket, wearing cozy pyjamas or sweat pants, and cuddling up with your pet. You can also hug someone you care about or get a massage from a loved one. You can also try massaging your own hands or try rolling out your muscles on a roller ball. Taking a bath or using a heating pad or hot water bottle are also great options.
SIGHT
The things we take the time to look at can have a compelling effect on us. Ideas for using sight that may be soothing are to take a walk in nature or look through photos from a favourite vacation or a book with photos of a place you’d like to visit. Other ideas are to observe a scene that brings a sense of awe such as vast forests, mountain ranges, oceans, lakes, rivers or waterfalls. You could look up at the sky at night and notice the stars, look at pictures of the universe or watch a show about space.
SMELL
Scent can be a very powerful sense for self-soothing. It is one of the senses that connect us quickly with memories, so make sure you are choosing scents that invoke positive and calming memories. You may want to try your favourite perfume or a loved one’s cologne or perfume, a shower gel with a scent that you enjoy, candles, or a diffuser with calming essential oils. You can also step out into nature and take in the scents of flowers, leaves, grass and fresh air.
TASTE
The vagus nerve is a nerve involved in the autonomic nervous system that regulates the state of “rest and digest”. It also has a role in our social engagement system and has pathways in the mouth and throat. This makes the sensation of taste a great strategy for self-soothing and accessing a state of calm and connection. Try making your favourite meal, or having a dessert that you love. Warm beverages like coffee, tea, or hot chocolate can be great ideas as well, or do the opposite and have something cold like ice cream, a popsicle or smoothie.
SOUND
Sound can be an effective strategy for self-soothing. You can see the effects of how soothing sound can be if you have ever seen a baby calmed by gentle singing or a lullaby. Many trauma experts even study the remarkable healing effects that rhythm has on the nervous system. Try self-soothing with sound by creating a soft and calming music playlist, use an app that plays nature sounds, sit by a fountain or stream, tap out a rhythm on a drum, or sing to yourself.
BONUS * MOVEMENT*
Similar to sound, trauma experts talk about the regulating effect of rhythm in movement. I mention trauma research, but these strategies are soothing and regulating for anyone. Try rocking in a chair, spinning, swinging or swaying from side to side. You can also join activities like yoga, karate, tai chi, swimming, dancing, or running. Activities that are patterned and have repetition are key.
Now you should have a few different ideas to try for self-soothing. Remember not all strategies work for everyone so choose which ones appeal to you the most or strategies you think will work best for you.
Is there a self-soothing strategies that wasn’t mentioned in this post? Share your favourite self-soothing strategies in the in the comments.
*DISCLAIMER*
The content included in this blog and in all future blog posts is for educational purposes only and is not a replacement or substitute for individualized mental health or medical care. Past and current clients risk breaching confidentiality by commenting on blog posts. I am unable to answer personal mental health questions through the comments.
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